The thoughts of me losing my masters causes me to lose out my beauty sleep. I was so worried knowing that my supervisors will be mad because of my slow progress in research. He did nagged a little but he appeared to be more helpful this time. He suggested to send me over to a conference by the end of this year to publish whatever results i have. with the condition..i need to pay for my own flight ticket...the rest is on him...well..on the grant..seems like this is the only way...
I just finished my writeup on the abstract...and i MUST work HARD within this two months...he would be expecting to see me at least once a week to discuss on my progress. Now i feel important again to him...as his first student. Sometimes, i wonder if this is all in His plan for me...how much i bragged on him neglecting...blablabla..now i feel welcome again. I thought He was on 'away mode' (quoting from TPT) when all my prayers were in the 'waiting list'. He actually hear me...i pray for wisdom and strength....now i have got so much to study and so many things to do ..to make me wiser and stronger... i believe that with God all things are possible.
Today, TPT sent me a link an article after knowing my problems. Thank you, PT...i know you are not good at comforting...i felt the concern from the every little thing you do. There is this line that has been repeated a few times by Dr.Schuller in the article.. Tough times never last, tough people always do!.. Let's just pray that my tough time will soon be over and i will see myself tougher after this. Amen.
Friday, October 17, 2008
I received a phone call today from my supervisor today. The first thing that came out from him is asking where am i . I thought he need me back but he asked if he could meet me tomorrow. I sensed something is wrong. He told me that we have something urgent to discuss. Then, he delivered a bad news for me. Apparently, somebody in MARDI is doing the same thing like i'm doing...and they found some results. Therefore, if they managed to publish the results, my masters will be gone. I'm worried sick . How can they be doing the same thing like i'm doing? what if they really managed to publish before me...??? what will happen to me??? I cant think of anything else but to pray hard. Let's just pray that i could come up with something like a collaboration or ...whatever....i just want to leave upm as soon as possible with my masters..feeling hopeless right now...wish to sink into his arms...
at 1:02 AM